Forgotten American


Today marks ninth month since I arrived on St Marten my Island I call my second home, I arrived on Oct 25 th 2015, on one way ticket to start my life for the coming season. Little I knew I would be detained, incarcerated and left without no income, no family and no means to survive. I never imagined, my own home could become my prison, this day has brought me to shame and discouragement only a stranger can feel when arriving in a foreign country or a jail cell. My life is a living nightmare; I have survived these 36 weeks, having the same routine each morning, afternoon and evenings. Weekends come and go as a blur. Few months ago I started a new practice, which at the time was pathetic, and absolutely mad. Each Thursday I started to drink my favorite Johnny walker drink, in short Johnny black, I would intoxicate myself to level, where morning sunshine had a meaning and the days after, if u ask why I practice this habit my answer is truly simple. I wanted to minus as many days possible to shorten the week, without leaving my room. I have been discriminated, called names and asked to leave restaurant as I was a less of their class system. I have survived on pennies and begged as a homeless person to strangers, Once upon a time they were my friends.
My story is too long and I doubt at one time I could express my feelings, my blackness of real life. I have missed half a year and still I remain in daze. I have no friends, I have no family, and my loving children don’t have a clue what really happened to their father. I am alone I see myself withering away slowly to pain of being alone, only a human can imagine if they had there both shoes off. In all respect I am not a saint, nor a person I have been labeled.

Thank you for reading, I wish to continue to writing in future as I have a story to be shared .People need to understand the consequences one can face anytime in their life.


  1. Locking yourself in isolation isn’t the answer sir. A new routine without alcohol and/or drugs whereby you wake up at dawn, go out to a nice calm spot (a beach for instance) and be still (meditate) and take in the moment, however painful it might be and accept it without judgement or shame. Take in the beautiful nature around you and appreciate that you are given another day to enjoy these scenes. Take a swim, wash away the old you on your way to the new you. Give your kids and loves ones a call or send them an email. Connect with those that love you. Disregard those that don’t. Find a way to earn a bit of money. Even if it means washing cars or doing yard work. Take pride in it. Give thanks and appreciate the small things. You will become a wealthy man in all aspects if u follow the above as a routine. Your life will be 180 degrees different if you follow the above strictly every day. I trust you can do it. Now show yourself you can do it. Godspeed sir.